To Do

everytime its the same story. same ol, same ol. Confirm have to-do list during a Term Break. I just sent out a pretty long last minute email. forked lah.

1. 2 scripts for a 15mins play with 3 or less characters.
2. Minutes writing Practice for Comm skills test
3. MAG T-shirt Design
4. Invites
5. Find presents
6. show the ropes to blog making
7. Worry about Will @ TP and Open House

My Schedule
Tuesday: SNT photo shoot, briefing
Wednesday: Singapore Zoological Gardens with Auntie Ants crew
Thursday: El-Sheik with Sarah and Nadia
Friday: DK Training
Saturday: No plans as of yet
Sunday: No plans as of yet
Monday: No plans as of yet

Gonna be bloody broke lor. fishcakes.

And its true, time seems to pass by faster during term breaks and holidays in general. Lucky for me the weather is just so perfect for naps in the late afternoons.


Anyway, the past few days have been filled will DVDs courtesy of Aida!
I watched Nobody Knows, Singapore Shorts, The Return and recently (as in just now) Kandahar.
All with beautiful photography. All has depth in terms of message. Maybe draggy for the common man but life is but draggy.

Go watch!
Pahlawan Putih

Mari Kerismas

To all who celebrate and do not, Kerismas. The Melayu version of X'mas.


All i want for Kerismas is a bike license plus a vintage bike

Yesterday,
i had a show at Masjid Darussalam with the Geylang Serai Boys Club. We were asked on Thursday about the show. Confirmed that night itself.
Tema: Jihad. Wrote lyrics of yengki friday morning. Decide to use lagu kelantan for juara. Didnt show up for training you know why. Then on Saturday... Wrote lyrics to kelantan and patani on the way to Clementi (MRT). So last minute but most of our guys came down. Dah macam comp squad - 6-6. Kelakar lah bila all the respective pasangans wore tudung. Kecoh.
Riuh balik. I have a good feeling about this. I smiled more yesterday. A bigs thanks yous to abang heartlanders kita for closing the deal... Zuraidi!

Juara
Sungguh sedih kalau tengok peperangan*
tindih-tindih atas tembok bergulinggan
paling sedih putus kaki, kudung tangan
tinggal kasi tinggal bini putus tunang
(*Actual word: kemalangan)

Yengki
Merah mengalir nyawa menghilang
jari menggetir tangis berlinang
gelar jihad Maha Penyayang
runtuh makna dijadikan jalang

Kelantan
Ulang-ulang ia dirakam
ulang-ulang ia ditayang
minda dunia ia menerkam
salah faham wabak melayang

Hai peluru dilepaskan
konon suci peperangan
apa guna senjataan
sempurnakan dulu iman

Patani
Peperangan!

Jihad: Peperangan suci untuk mempertahankan agama Islam demi Allah s.w.t

Peperangan?
Oh..Tembak, senapang, bom...baru-baru ni, Nuclear!

Bukan...itu salah faham.

Peperangan bukan setakat pedang dengan pedang,
senapang dengan senapang
bunuh-menbunuh!

Tetapi..
Berjuang untuk iman, kedamaian, keharmonian dan kesejahteraan hidup kita sebagai umat Islam.

Matang
(Insert Citra Matang)

Penutup
Ala Ewa, Ewa Bulan
Wau Bulan Teraju Tiga

>Tamat<

Hancur!... Patani didnt even rhyme. I wanted to explore the meaningn of Jihad but in the end rosak cos Ardi was also contributing..heh. Confirmed fail IF it were for a comp. I am growing more and more pressurised as quite alot of expectation falls on me for lyrics section. I must not let them down for MP2006. Then again.. im still paralysed from the aftershock. Lets just not think too much.

A video was taken. and i captured this very buruk picture of myself

Penghayatan mau lebih - Baik Party Hat!


We also took pictures -Informal pun macam formal(Group at the right of picture) Muka cramp (Aidi and Me on left.) and the rest...

Week of the week

To those who have been whining for update, whine no more. For i is here.
Been inactive due to my activity outside of the world wide web. Quite an eventful week i say.
First were the term tests. I would rename term pain-in-the-asses. My last paper was the most difficult. I was so bloody sleepy that i kept nodding off during the first half an hour of the paper.
A lot of going out.
on Tueday, after two grueling papers, me and aida decided to lepak at Airport (mini celebration as i aida finished her papers, while i still had 2 more to go that thursday.) Discovered the wonders of Popeye's where Ili was working. Then I read a chapter of a cool illustrated novel, Ramadhan by (i forgot the author), at Terminal 2, Coffee Bean. Amazingly time flew past fast as we waited for ili to finish her shift. The airport just brings back memories of those BK crew days - i miss the secret hangout.

On wednesday, i studied at Starbucks Tampines. There's this corner which is so bloody conducive for me. I had the Caramel Frappe and what else? Lemon Citron Tart. No one believes me when i say that starbuck Tampines is only outlet you can get the heavenly tart.

Then on thursday, the 2nd day which had 2 papers, i went home to sleep. Woo.. celebrations habis.

Then on friday. Met a friend at chinatown, my first time aware that i was in chinatown, go round round. Then met the girls women ladies (pun intended) for arab street experience. To many things happened. Made it more memorable. heh.
There was the Bussorah Street, Costume Costume shop, Taman Warisan, Al Majlis (legal sheesha-ing y'all - hoho), a quick toilet break at Bugis Junction, Shaw tower for Starbucks (4 drinks for the price of one), Esplanade Roof top, the after that is to be kept to strict confidentiality. What a funny day.

here are the pictures

Whoops.. (Looks at finger)


hehehe


New band in town


Dream scooter


At the esplanade

i live for the day. Cos change is a definate constant. And we can never go back to the old ways...

High..
Pahlawan Putih

Kill me!

Just smack me in the head with a radioactive duck with the bird flu. So in the end, the weekend was wasted. I did not do any studying. Pinch yourself if you think im proud. im ashamed. what manner of disgrace is this? I just couldnt study. simply couldnt study. well i tried. but to no avail.

What was i doing? Sleeping. and changing my friendster profile.

and getting drunk on potato chowder - ouh but it was the best.

Later at 1 i have an open book test. you know how open book tests are.. bloody sneaking and it forces you to think! anyway.. here's my schedule

Food Preservation & Quality Assurance Project 19 Dec 2005 (Mon)
Communication Skills for Applied Science 3 20 Dec 2005 (Tues)
Health and Wellness 20 Dec 2005 (Tues)
Advanced Food Science 22 Dec 2005 (Thurs)
PBPN 22 Dec 2005 (Thurs)

Doom awaits.
Pahlawan Putih

Ooh.. potato chowder..

I started at 3 and ended at 4.50 - cooking. Then i went to faddy's blog. I like this video. Very interesting.
The video i had my lunch with.

*video taken off*. it seems like you cant have two flash players in one site. so...

[Click Here!]
highly recommended

An afternoon with the hijabbed
Pahlawan Putih

so much for not revealing the new template. i forgot that i saved it in blogger for the meantime. but when i posted the previous post. i published the template with it

Hiatus

I never really like to mention that I would be on hiatus. I don’t have that kind of will power to not log in to the internet for more than a day.

Finished cleaning my room a while back. Organised a must revise stack for my term test this coming week aka the week stating tmrw. I m such a shit head. Im stressed that I haven’t started my revision. Not cos my test is tmrw. I mean this could be a bad habit.

Mom’s in KL for a wedding. Brought the 3 younger ones with her. Its weird how the ‘men’ of the house (bibik not included) are left in the house. We all hardly talk to each other. Hardly even home come to think of it. I kinda miss the times at BLK 147. hehe, absorbed with nostalgia. Anyway.. I think im going out to get some stuff to last me for the next two days or so. Prolly cooking a big pot Potato chowder – hehe to aida, then refrigerate some.

In the last two days or so, I was experimenting on a new blog template. But I guess its still too flawful to be posted. Now i vaguely know how to use macromedia flash. Maybe after term test I’ll get it refined

Reply to tags
duX`-: wuits, bape kau dapat for first two assignments..?
I got 7 for my mask, 8.5 for the write up. Tak fair sarks. But for my presentation, 10.5. hahah

pinkphreak: Your hosting wasn't that bad just that at some point of time I couldn't make up what you were saying
Must have been the apek-sound system rented mics

sha: nice bloggy!!! but the pic a bit weird uh... hairy.. heh. btw, i saw u in tp before. u performed dk outside library right?
I readily accept the fact that im hairy. It’s the aesthetic Hoho. Yeah that was me sitting at the end making a fool out of my foolish self.

DiLa: welloo... hehe awak pun lost hp ke? iskh iskh iskhh... niwayz, nice skin u got there. Smilezz
(Smiles back) Thank you.

And I think the word ‘gay’ is being mentioned a little too much for comfort.

ange: do you think you look gay?
anonymous: wow...hott!! macy gray i mean...wahahaahhaha!!!
anakboyan: irfan...err...u seriously look freaking gay....hmmm.tis tis production by teater kami...interested?
anakboyan: kiddin yah....u noe wat...u look way more older and mature for ur age....
shidah: irfan gay? nt at all.U're all changed seh fan.Gd job
anakboyan: i din say he's gay. only tt he LOOKed gay....it's 2 diff things...no offence yah...peace..
aida: i told you you look gay in that pic. tak nak dgr. haha...
ren.: hahhaa.. gay=happy wat.. hahaha.. sorry.. kpo me...

Enlighten me. How does one look gay?
I thought it was a nice picture, and I still think it is. Anyway its just a reference for my future self. Sheesh…big fuss over a dumb picture. How controversial can I get?
Joeyaah bte Jengangan (not her real name – identity has been asked to be kept confidential) even said I should arrested for such a picture. The subject of the email? ”Call the police, and the fire brigade at that”. Joeyaah, you crack me up, but lets hope the flame isn’t rekindled between us – hohoho.
Cant a man look good once in a while?
So yeah it doesn’t matter because its an N/A status( not applicable). I m not gay. But really… don’t you think it’s a nice picture? Other than the fact im wearing a tight I-won-a-radio-contest-few-years-back Macy gray t-shirt?

princess: i love da name irfan!!
Hahah thanks for the random compliment. I found out that my name really truly means thankfulness. Hmm…

Back to the procrastination
Pahlawan Putih

Where do i go from here?


If that is really a concern.
Aida says we manusias like to complicate things.
No comments.
Yes im 18. already.

i dont see a cause for celebration.
im sorta upset actually.
Me being 17 was the best time i had. Seriously.
Will miss being 17. will miss those times.

I have always been a failure at celebrating birthdays, especially mine.
Slept 7hrs throughout the day. - So bloody relaxing.
Got twenty over mgs - first time in years

Would like to take this opportunity to thank those who msged me Bro Shariff, kakak ya, Hidayah, Noora, Shikin, Kak Ruf, Zuraidy, Jas, Angel, Amin, dee and dessy. Tags from amalina, imran, anakboyan, yaya, ren, ange, RaQ, sharifah, MKhan, Faddy, shidah, duX`-, nur kasih. Email from Nurul. Also would like to thank aida for the belated blog post. hohoh..

Most birthday wishes from friends / relatives / N/A ever. thus i reinforce that being 17 was the best experience i had. I would like to thank the Almighty for all that he has given me.

Good memories.
For the first time i won in a competition -Click photo competition. Became close to PST -Pentas, Khatulistiwa. Started experimenting with lyrics. Became President. Organized events. Fell in Love. Nominated as a group for Awok-awok terbaik. Got my first ever trophy (serious, first ever in my entire pathetic life)- Senikata Harapan. Made friends with respected people. Went for a script-writing workshop with the most radical bunch of MAG-ians(Became an old kelantanese maid). Dikir, drama then dance. Friendships forged. Some strengthened. Got involved in a whole lot of events. Events that started the ball rolling in relation to making friends. Survived two semesters. Accepted myself.

On to terrible things. I lost my phone. Dropped the new one in the sea. Lost my trusty blue bike. Lost my love. failed a paper - had to sit for supp. Got my brother's ez-link confiscated. struggling to survive this semester and some other stuff i cant remember


This is me. 18.

wonder how i would look like if i survive to be 81. hohoh.. confirm lagi handsome.
As for now, im depressed. Funny thing was we had a family session at (where else?)mom's room. Was an open informal discussion about random stuff. I told her i feel like jumping and that if i dont im not going to work but instead leech on her bonuses and what not. hahaha Kidding lah!

Semuanya ku lepaskan... demi masa hadapan....
The only thing that keeps me going is the thought of a getaway with my friends. All the beaches im gonna meet.(no pun intended) - Tioman, Ubin, Desaru?

"Ombak yang menjamah
kakiku sekali
takkan dapat
kukenali lagi" - A. Samad Said

rayuku sayu, layu,
Pahlawan Putih

happy birthday to me

DIKIR SHIOK! BERAYA!!!

Glad its over. Glad it happened.

Though me and Ardi suck-ed at hosting, we had our fair share of fun.


Kononnya judge. Ye ye aje


Jejaka of the year finalists. -raye dah habis lo..

Lots of lessons learnt as a whole. Gigantic portions of effort put in by all the members. Titisan keringat, darah dan air mata membasahi baju kurung kami. Hehe. I had to be secretary, designer, host, paper cutter, runner, cross-checking counter and many more.
Now, I really understand the feeling of the organizers in relation to a dikir competition and how co-operation is much sought after from the participants. If not, all hell breaks loose. The only problem I saw just now, was the delegation of task. Other than that, we had fun... hohoh. I personally liked the bee hoon.

As for performance wise, I couldn’t really judge as I was backstage. However Angkatan Sekolah Lama was really good. I liked the karut. Cant remember how the juara sound like – hope to see the VCD soon. Yan did good but there's still something thats missing.

More updates at Tumpat's Website

Cant wait to write my next piece. Ya I really miss squeezing my brains of every bit of creative juice, pulling out my hair, falling sleeping on my draft naskahs, flipping through the kamus looking for a word that rhymes, worsening my myopia, just to come up with a piece.

I was afraid to fall. Afraid to fail.

Pucat sekali lagi
Pahlawan Putih

Lelembut

From the start till the end, it was pure entertainment. Be it wacky or scary, it was pure entertainment. I enjoyed the fact that it was intellectually challenging to understand. I could only imagine the amount the research that had to be done for such a script and production. I also liked the fact it touched on the ‘stories’ we hear e.g. Bruce Lee’s death, Neil Armstrong hearing the adzan on the moon etc, and questions their reliability.

I think there’s a story behind the story. There’s a lesson. A message to be sent across. But im not sure what it is. Still piecing up the story with my memory of the scenes. I wish I had a recording of the piece. Or a script. or someone who has a good memory of it. Still a lot to decipher – cos every action has its justifications...

The random turns tickled my funny bone till it couldn’t be tickled anymore. Hantugerah with Japanese hosts. The mengaji nonsense – ‘Jangan diri depan garisan kuning…’. The Assalamualaikum, kum apa, combat, bat apa, batman… - brings back the childhood memories. Pochong main catching.

The cast deserves a mention. They had to sing and dance (sometimes at the same time) on top of acting. All were execellent. The actor whom I thought was good would be the one who played Romo and the Hantugerah host. My favourite would be the girl with the slang, she got my bulu romas at attention. When she was singing that almost jawa song (with the added audio effects and all) her notes pierced my soul and sent it fluttering. Aah…

On a whole, it was a pleasant, entertaining, hard to forget experience.
After it ended, it was another story all together. The lepaking at lau pa sat, coffee bean beside the river, then Starbucks at Raffles Shopping Centre.


Before the show


After the show


On our way to Lau Pa Sat they decide to jump.


At Lau Pa Sat with Ili aka Ms-salah-naik-bus.
Ili already caught the Friday night performance.

Ku tanam benih dengan penuh ragu. Tapi berputik ni semangat pabila ku lihat kepastian darimu. Biar kecil tapak mu, asalkan ia bukan tapak mengundurkan diri.
So that was the day I broke myself.

I was broke(n).
Pahlawan Putih

So much to blog so little time

If you havent already figured out, my inactivity is mainly due to the events i have a part to play in. Gemilang Aidilfitri was two weeks ago, but it seems like it was yesterday. Cos here i am anyaming ketupats again... hohoho..

I really wanna blog long but i gotta be at the CC by 1030hrs tmrw. Doing up my script with Ardi. Yeah... if you also havent figured out, im Hosting the Event with Ardi. My nickname in Tumpat sessions is 'berg', [Wallahu 'Alam] (At least its sempurna-er than Bopeng or Africa -hohoho) but now im OC (Officer-in-charge) for Design and Finance. hahahaha
all the responsibility i dont wanna hold... but yesterday when i saw the banner i made in actual size, macam bangga gitu loh...


Tickets still available at the door
$15 = $2 to Jamiyah, $6 for buffet dinner, the rest to expenses for the competition itself. hohoh

Random Thoughts:
-Thanks Angel Asmah Jasmine for the bag. I like it alot and my laptop fits in!! hoho
-Aida! Teh peng at Harbor front soon. Without halia. heh. Ili, D and yan too
-Merahnya mata mu tidakkan menggentarkan kewujudanku
-Still wanna blog bout lelembut!
-Aku rindu menulis. dan berdikir barat..

Selamat Datang Ke DIKIR SHIOK! BERAYA!!!
Pahlawan Putih

Allow my soul to absorb your tranquility...

Thats the direct translation of 'Izinkan Batinku Menyerap Ketenanganmu'
And that sounds wrong.

Translation has its limitations. The phrase featured on the header pic of this blog can also be translated as 'Give my insides the permission to marinate in your peace'. hohoh wrong-er

As you all know, the beach it my retreat. Thus no further explaination required for the choice of concept.


I have been wanting to blog on a day i remember to be nice.

The highlight of the day would have been the start. I woke up feeling happy and my body, far from any form of fatigue. It was ard 8am in the morning and i really felt elated for some reason or another. Just light and refreshed. Then i had an easy test. followed by nothing! so i headed home and took a wonderful nap as the weather was perfect. So that was nice. then it started being shitty prior to the fact i had a report to hand in the following day. Makz...

maybe its cos im down with the bug. The love bug. This infactuation is draining the hell out me. And im not sure it will go anywhere. But i still have hopes. *Clenching my jaw. Facial muscles tighten. teeth shinning.

Reply to tags
aida: you put that much thought into your mask huh? makes it even more appealing to me. it's lovely btw
Thanks man. I guess I have been trained to focus on detail.

mkhan: n u got to take a picture with M NASIR!!! WARFGGGGHH!!
Yeah. Warfgggghh.
mkhan: ohmygosh ur mask is sooo LAWA!!! and ur write-up ah...PHOOO I feel so intimidated.
Ouh don’t be. I was worried no one could understand it as I did half asleep.

duX`-: seeeyaakk ahh kauuu~ citer peh baik. now comes the second assignment. heh heh. kau pilih ape ah?
Thanks sia. Marcel Duchamp. Baru ingat – got to do research

Faddy: "lucky bugger" sounds sooooo darn familar. kekeek!! anyway, yah!! the lights were like wowoweeeee! uber chio.
Yeah with the smoke and all.

kizzie: funny how we always see m. nasir under tok long's block at bedok reservoir on first day Raya when we were younger& now you're so into him. should've gone up to him then eh. no other fans to kacau
Yea! Come to think of it I have the faintest most vaguest memory of that happening. What a waste… but I like Mentera Semerah Padi since young hohoh

passerby: well i mean it IS u.lol sorry.
passerby: somehow that mask looks like u.heh
Hey no worries. No need to apologise. Even I was thinking of then. Then I went “Duh that’s my bloody face. How stupid can I get” – that’s rhetorical question btw

ange: send me my mask lah you. (:
done. Sorry I almost suffocate you. Hoho. It was the nose’s fault.

anonymous: wow. i like teh whole concept and how each detailed is justified! good job.
Thanks a million. though i wish i vaguely know who you are.

Dee: nice nice skin! eh tt pic i took rite? Heh
Abeh bangga ah… hahah but I like the pic on the left more.

Fad: now thats what i call a beautiful template.
This is what I call a torturous template.

I thought since I’ve done more than 10 templates I would finish up faster, but that’s just a myth. Maybe its cos I look for new stuff to do and explore/experiment.

Today was almost photoshop day. I did the template, MAG recruitment forms that have yet to be approved and a part of the Dikir Shiok! Beraya!!! certificates of participation. Wooo my eyes. All that radiation. All that electricity…


im gonna blog about lelembut some other time... no mood now..

Lelembut - Intellectually intriguing
Pahlawan Putih

To mask or not to mask...

That is Arts Appreciation.

Our task was to make a mask and do it up anyway we like. This is my mask.

on me


my face, my mask.

We also had to do a write up. So this is mine...

Arts App. - Mask Making
Long before my partner laid strips of plaster on my face, I came up with a rough concept for the mask. The Legend of Princess Mount Ophir, more commonly known in the Malay community as ‘Lagenda Puteri Gunung Ledang’, inspires the idea for the concept. Briefly, the legend is about a Javanese Princess from Majapahit who came to Gunung Ledang in Malacca to be with her lover, Hang Tuah. Prior to that, she faced a lot of obstacles including being forced to marry the Sultan of Malacca to prevent invaders from conquering her native land. In the end, she was cursed – she was never to be seen by anyone or they will die a terrible death through internal bleeding. This is depicted in the absence of eyeholes in my mask.

I try to depict parts of this beautiful legend through my mask. I requested that the mask be made with a peak at the forehead to represent Mount Ophir itself, the mountain Gusti Putri Retno Dumillah was prepared to climb for her lover. It also signifies the climax of her love that she will never achieve and that she can only dream of, thus the peak is placed above the forehead. The peak has blue designs on it to show that it is only fantasy in nature. Painted gold to look like a crown, the design on the forehead, which was initially done with 3D fabric paint to give texture, represents Gusti Putri’s royal background

To follow Javanese tradition, the brows are forked, also known as Kening Bercabang, representing a conflict and contradiction of values between Gusti Putri and her lover, Hang Tuah. Above the left brow are 7 dots that represent the conditions she requested from the sultan before she would except his hand in marriage.

I also attached a piece of batik cloth, in the shape of flowing tears, to the right of the mask to represent her eternal despair. Batik was chosen as its patterns can be infinite and that it originated in Indonesia just like Gusti Putri.

On the left part of the mask, I also painted tears in blue, green and black. Some belief that rain at Mount Ophir are actually Gusti Putri’s tears. They will then flood the rivers and waterfalls then give life to the flora and fauna surrounding it. Thus the painted tears are to represent the river and the lush forest that surrounds it. Other than the forest, green represents her jealousy towards Hang Tuah’s loyalty to the Sultan

The lips were painted black as a symbol of deprivation from love and her desires. Her yearning to be with Hang Tuah is described as a thirst that can never be quenched.

Personally I can relate to the legend and so I decided make it the subject of my mask. Also I like Asian art and am myself partly Javanese.

Thus the story of Gusti Putri depicted in my mask

Jika ini hakikatnya...
Pahlawan Putih