DALAM SAAT ITU

Sudah pun termaktub dari dulu
“Sessungguhnya manusia benar-benar berada dalam kerugian…”
sudah pun diberi amaran seribu
tingkah laku biarlah berpatutan


Dalam saat itu
hati kan menggelodak
mungkin pun merusuh
kerana ratunya catur digerak, diletak

Manalah tahu?
Dalam saat itu
Yang tak diundang bertamu
Yang tak dijangka bertemu


Dalam nafas itu
jantung ku meranjang
sedang ku masih keliru
buat nafas itu memanjang

Kanan, kiri, ku melangkah
jauh di hadapan baru ku sedar
kesyukuran padaNya melimpah
dan tak usah lagi digelar


Dalam kelip mata itu
fikiran menjadi pilu
dek bertapak di takhta baru
“Apakah ini tanggungjawab ku?”

ketawa mula berselang silu
lidah bertambah kelu
akibat otak yang dibelenggu
akibat titah yang dipangku


Dalam renungan itu
dua insan bertafsiran mata
ketika rindu tersengkang di kalbu
malangnya kisah berakhir begitu saja

Apalah nasib engkau dan aku
cinta menipu
kita ditipu
engkau memalu


Dalam tepisan itu
anak yang menderhaka
ibu pula ditikam lesu
sewajarnya kesalahan siapa?

Air mata buaya
darah segumpal
perit kononnya kau merasa
walhal, walhal...


Dalam jelingan itu
aku menjadi seteru
disebarkan dalam bisikanmu
“Dialah yang jahat! durjana! asyik menipu!”

Bagai gelegar buluh
kau menonjolkan dengan angkuh
kian seperti senapang bambu
aku tinggalkan tanpa pengaruh


Dalam mimpi itu
kau lesap dari dunia fana ku
sungguhlah indah keadaan begitu
bila cabaran tiada, walaupun satu

Benci tak cukup seimbang dengan perasaanku
membara dalam inti, menanti, menunggu waktu
laharnya akan mengancam makna kewujudan mu
kabusnya akan menyesak setiap lanjutan mu!

Dalam saat lalu
aku mengimbas laju
Aku kah aku?
Atau aku ditipu aku?

Inilah rintihanku
Pahlawan Putih

Change of song

Always tryna be different, always the excentric one. So i changed blog song.
Dah hint hint pun masih takda terima kasih.. lain kali kena copyright.
hahahah
Whoever who wishes to use/take this song would permission is required first.

i also added a want list to remind me what im saving my money for. I'll add in drving license when im 18. I wanna get a scooter so everytime i want to run away, i can just ride away. to tanjong balau perhaps.

Tumpat, kumpulan terselekeh...

"Irfan, stop it with the muka cheena eh" - never look good in dk pics.. haha


I need a bitch beach

too many of the former already
Pahlawan Putih

Woohoo (I think)

Persada's done and over with. Brought home a sprained swollen ankle, multiple wounds on my fingers and toes, a broken sense of belonging and a shard of unfinished business.

Highlight for me would be the belated mid-autumn festival we had at the long jump mattress. The sky is really just so beautiful that it is usually a subject in most literature pieces.



Another highlight was the 30mins i spent under the warm running shower (which spontaneously massaged every inch of my aching body). I'm gonna do it again soon. - heh pergi sekolah setakat mandi air panas. inilah nasib seorang yang rumah tidak berheater

Im finished with the DIKIR SHOIK! BERAYA!!! invitation cards.. Hope the event goes out well. Hope i dont have to do much.. I wanted to do so much for this vacation period but now i already am. Only problem is these things are not for myself. I still wanna just chill at Tanjung Balau, Desaru. enjoy the waves and all..

Mother mengamuk that i failed one subject. She keeps linking it with the presidency - dah takdir Allah yang maha berkuasa. Apo yang boleh hambo buat?

Today i went for my revision. It was fun. I got to know i passed the main exam but my performance throughout the whole semester caused me the fall/fail. Guys, please pray for my success. Amin

Dalam perselisihan
masih terdapat insan-insan yang berjabat tangan,
yang berbalas senyuman,
yang sama-sama merindukan masa depan.
Ahai senang sungguh bila dapat berteman,
Rakan jadi kawan,
Kawan jadi rakan,
Kongsi pengalaman,
Berjalan-jalan,
menceritakan percintaan,
menghidupkan perbualan,
Sama-samaan,
Hingga akhir zaman...

i like the number 3. Now i know why.... hahaha

Why did He give me so much when in actual fact i cant even return a speck...
Why am i such a/have a big, bum.

Siapa/mana dia gadis watak utama?
Pahlawan Putih

im tired. why cant you see that?

Agar tidak guris lagi hati yang lemah. di belakang kulit nan keras batu, isinya lemah dan senang memalu. ahai saudara seperjuangan... bila rima dan ritma lari, riwayat ini masih kah lagi?
Melentur buluh biar dari rebungnya. melilit dahulu kemudian memanjat. kalau nak menurut biar berakal. kalau nak mengikut biar pintar, belum duduk sudah melunjur....
Hijaunya dikau terpampang dalam bicara, apa salah bersopan dalam tengkara?
Macam tin kosong....

To think of it it was only 2 lines... mukin pedasnya terasa pada yang seterusnya. Walhal bicara ditujukan kepada yang lain.

Salam maaf. jika masih kedahagaan darah, mungkin darahlah juga racunnya...

Lumatnya daging mentah
Pahlawan putih

AF

Fook it, fullertonic. I got an F for NLS as expected. wah lanz. I zunno what to zo anymorez. So much for aiming for no supp paper.

Is already friday and im still seperti katak di simbah air. A lot of things to do. Ai-yoooo.

Lets talk about planet dikir. Like its not already been talked about so much. heh, maybe that would take my mind of some things.

Minta izin, tumpang popularity sekejap...

Juara's that managed to impart that tingle down the spine
STT - her control was very good. Managed to execute all the right lengoks. though there was not much of a climax, she was good.
MKY - clarity, penghayatan almost there, lengok macam air...smooth ajer...
SDP - favourite of the bunch(just look at blog song). trademark lengok just rock my socks (listen 0:53). penghayatan was there. lyrics kat lengan. haha

Karut pulak
STT - "GU!nung ku daki" "RRrrrebah" "..dalam ingatan, hati terpaut" hahah she was really funny indirectly. (Conscience saying "tak baik ketawakan orang")
KP - Most melodious of the bunch. But i never exactly understood what makes a good karut. To me he's good. a wonder why tak dicalon...
DD - Ah mari, kita bunuh, harus bunuh, kena bunuh, yok kita bunuh! hahahah kecioh sarkis. favourite of the bunch. "masyarakat bangsa, masyarakat bangsa"

To think dikir is a very complicated thing. choreography, melody, j, k, percussions etc etc.. so many things that can cock up. so many things that can affect marks.

This is just in..

adigun n bob: asal nak kena bebual pasal aswa??!!bebual pasal anak seni tak nak!!kalau berani jumpa kita org...tak mau bebual bnyk...

Come on lah.. we are old enough to know everone has a right to our own opinion. Setiap insan ada hak berpendapat. Itu lah pendapatku. Kata-kata engkau memang kasar, bayangan sifatmu. Lebih berani kalau aku menghindari jemputanmu untuk bertemu/tengkar. Ampunkanlah hamba yang tak kenal terus kamu (berdua?). dan kan ku kabulkan permintaan itu

Anak seni - A very interesting thai set. Eye opener was the last chorus where they actually sang in Thai. At first their "costume" was interesting. Awok-awok wore those long golden nails used in thai dance. dont only women use that? But after awhile you realise that the story is about Nang Nak. was it a happy story? confetti? the bunga melur and jossticks suited the set more. the thai concept was the highlight.

Alun: skrang ni aku ketua aswa,aku tak hapi dgn ape kau ckp pasal grp aku...kalau kau tak puas hati kau blh call aku kat ni no.90614201

Kekata hanya kekata, pendapat hanya pendapat. Jika tidak sudi, paling muka ke arah yang lain...

Siapa yang tidak puas hati,
siapa yang mengajurkan peperangan?

yang berani tidaklah yang benar
yang benar tidak mungkin berani

yang tidak berani
Pahlawan Putih
(ada masalah dengan itu?)

Selfish

You have always been that selfish bastard you call people (including me). Too blinded by your needs that you forget to take a look in the mirror. Thinking back, maybe you look in the mirror too much. for the wrong reason.

Aku dah macam orang suruhan. the list of things i have to do is much more than i can handle but i guess its what i gotta do (and what i agreed to). I can't start complaining now. To many already complaining. Thats all that they do i guess.

"Sob... sob.. I have been doing so much already...sob sob.."

ALa-la-la kesiannya engkau.

I hope Persada goes well.


for now, Cinta Monotoni is on the repeat mode.
What a sad song.
surge of adrenaline everytime.

and it makes me think. When's my Cinta coming?
I see few prospective Cinta's but i wonder...
*moths in my intestines.

Siapa dia gadis watak utama?
Pahlawan Putih

Kiss Miss Paratha

You can only get it at Srisun Paratha Restaurant near Tamp west CC. Delicious teh peng for a hefty 1.20. Partially/under- cooked Thosai Masala. But the company was great. Had alot of great laughs. Played games. Terror arh Izyan. Cari tadpoles lah. I'm glad i decided to join you guys at starbucks after ICN. Lepak lah.

Kadang-kala hansome tapi sentiasa bongok
Pahlawan Putih

Cooled down

Thanks to the lovely weather and listening back to some of the planet dikir songs. Thinking back, most of the 'established' groups were really good. Durba was good. So was Makyong, Neng and Kelana. It was very hard to guess the winners. Luckily there was no one group that bolot-ed each and every one of the individual prizes. And there was a sudden surge of good Karuts. Durba's, Maman, didi, Ifin and Mr Shariff.

Listening back brewed a whole urnful of emotions. If you listened intently, the songs for SDP9095 were quite depressing. Like the lengoks and all were very 'mengundurkan diri' sounding. Especially the wau bulan.
With the old timers leaving the scene, i guess i got worried with all this play-afool groups coming out. Imagine what would happen in 10 years time....

Funny part: "Betul tak Kak Ju? Betul tak Ayu? Betul tak Zaidy? Betul tak...(pauses) Kamal?"

CINTA…
dia rangka tunjang tema
awal tajuk akhir rima
irama sudah ritma pun sudah
ungkalnya yang tak sudah-sudah
karmanya tak gundah, gundah
siapa dia gadis watak utama
tak jera kais kalimah
CINTA…

Bunuh tu Bunuh, Bunuh Si Kutu, Kutu Kat Mana? Kutu di Kepala

hahahahahahahaha
Pahlawn Putih

Thoroughly upset...

What the hell were we thinking.
But more importantly what the hell were they thinking.

Being without a "parent group / kumpulan bimbingan" doesnt give us the right to have performed that way. And whatever it is, i think participating in a competition just to acknowledge the going off of two members for National Service is lame. Why doesnt he use his brains instead of his mouth?
And why have a reporting time if all of us are not gonna be there 1 hour after reporting time let alone on the reporting time. I hate being the only string that keeps it all attached.
I wanna just walk away but i dont think there's a street where i can freely express the contents of my heart in poetry. There's no street where i'll be walking with my 'family' members.

And im upset as Dikir was made a mockery. Groups thinking they can be overnight Kelana Purbas. Doesnt voice quality come first, before ragam? Isnt clapping loudly/compactly more important that anticipation of the next ragam? Why wasnt the song the highlight of each performance? Is ragam really that important?

(At this point i might get into trouble but heck, its my blog.)
Some pengasas also seem to not be using their brains. If that group is not ready, then back out from the competition. If you gonna argue about providing exposure, well then it seems like your exposing them into the line of mockery. Oh and continue to have "fancyful ragams" that no one in the team can execute or even comprehend. Memang sudah takdir lebih layak mereka jadi Nelayan.
Jangan setakat memenuhi syarat!

And as always, being the one who trys to lip read each word the juara or karut sings, i notice that a monotonous pattern of"kupasan" of the theme is occuring. (Including ours by wak cantuk.[Im full of regrets]) Some i cant even tell what they are talking about, since making out what they are softly singing is already a hard job. I was really hoping for SDP's naskah to get the award since more or less i've went through with the 'one and only' his process of actually finding a topic for the set. It was interesting, an eye-opener, a learning experience.

Overall, Planet Dikir didnt end off with a bang. So much for a finale.
The only highlight was the Twiggies i got from Kamar barber. The host nana just finished introducing the judges and so i clapped with the other (cukupkan syarat) non-ikhlas clappers. Then he turned and said "Tepuk nya pasal" then he gave the chocolatey packet to me.
Well i'm to 'this generation' to have actually seen the legend perform but i have heard remarkable stories. Maybe the twiggies i ate had some kind of sakti that would be passed on to me. hahaha to cure my inability to play percussion. Maybe i should have took twiggies from the other 3 judges too..
From Zaidy for wider malay vocabulary and poeticness.
From Kak Ju for karutless/proper karut skills
From Ayu for the ability to seem bored at most of the performance. heh well..

Upset and unconsolable
Pahlawan Putih

Si Purnama menjelma..

Dan bersandinglah enam insan berperisaikan shopping list dan bersenjatakan wang tunai $250.


Stuff for persada bought waaaaaaaaaaaaay ahead
Pahlawan Putih

Boring sark

Whats up sark with barbeques sark. I mean come on sark everytime its holidays, theres bound to be at least one barbeque sark. Bukannya apa sark but i dont really see the point of a barbeque sark. You come and pay money sark then what do you get? Uncooked chicken wings sark, bloody smokey smell on every inch of your body part sark, a step closer to cancer sark. Lebih baik organise a kenduri sark. Dapat doa selamat sark, kan lebih afdal sark. Tapi takpa sark, as long as dapat jumpa kawan lama sark. hahahah sark merepek sark irfan

Anyway, hahah its true sark ape. i already got 3 invites. Wow wee.

Time check: Planet dikir in 3 days
Persada in 9 days.

Planet dikir set, only went for 2 training so far. Missing tonight for Persada.

Persada games not yet confirmed. Alot on the waiting list.

Haiyah complicated sark
Pahlawan Putih sark

We may have hit something here...

kooniee: hows e talk?

The talk was absolutey fabulously terrificco. And im not just talking about the light snacks and refreshments itself (hehe).
We were treated like Medical Professionals, seated in 2 ballrooms with the one and only Profesor David JP. Barker! The talk was about Cardiovascular diseases and its relation to low birth weight. It was very insightful that i had to take notes (now i just cant find 'em).
Prof was saying that nutrition is important even before conception as during conception, a change in a healthier diet will not affect much of the foetus's development. It is known that foetuses that do not get sufficient nutrients for development tend to use it more for their brain development as it is the most important organ. Thus the other organs in the body are neglected and so would be poorly formed like for example poorly formed cardiovascular arteries. In the later life, even though the grown man/women is healthy, he would still bear poorly formed arteries and so he/she is more susceptible to cardiovascular diseases.
Ta da!

And when i say i may have hit something, i m talking about this new found interest in pre-pregnancy, pregnancy and infancy nutrition. I think this would be what im most interested in the moment. Watching Child of our time might have also affected my interest.
Woo hoo.. now i know what i wanna do


anonymous: can u please please change back the song to cinta duyung nelayannnnn. i wanna hear it manzzz.

jajabinx: New to Dikir here. Never heard a better song than that Ikan Duyung song. Looove it! Who's the composer???

Unfortunately i took of the song because i wanna take the opportunity to support the dikir scene by encouraging the purchase of CDs like Dikir Temasek I & II. heh. Anyways it doesnt blend in with the new layout. kekek
Anyway i think its time they released another dikir temasek like CD. Many songs played in competitions, from various groups, that are worth immortalising.

Cinta Duyung Nelayan is a song many recognise as their favourite song as soon as they start researching more on dikir prior to a budding interest. Well you've got to admit, nice catchy jawa-ish melody, great vocals by Yan (according to Mr Kelkatu. Even i dont know who he/she is) and an interesting storyline to it that lets the imagination soar.
Who's the composer?
check it out at the back of the Dikir Temasek CD case. hahaha

i have 6 tickets ($12each)left for Planet Dikir the Finale. Any takers?

chao chin chao
Pahlawan Putih

Pictorially speaking

Updates on a few stuff that have been happening...

For the Kakak Leen's wedding, was incharge for the design of these domes.


Trying to get artistic shots...



Bengkel penulisan skript e_remaja. Heheh.. Cedebah..


Muda nya aku.


Alamak. Si P*****n W****a T*****k



Cik Norli dropped by. So ilhan was here


He has this weird dance move that involves vigorous shaking...


and a cramped up face



The pose was supposed to be "tryna answer the phone" but i guess jas went deeper.


Sheraton Towers was posh.. and so we had to change to fit in.


Three of us listening to Professor JP Barker


Enjoy.

Going arab-ish again
Pahlawan Putih

Still under construction.. If only i didnt sign up for that talk...
Cardiovascular dieseases and such.. Gotta go.

Woohoo~

Last paper up and done with.
Macam nak terbang...

"Ba-a-gai tiupan se-ru-li-i-ing memecah sunyi pa-a-gi...
LANTAS ko-o-o-kok ayam desing Di-i-i-i hujung reban, di hujung reban..."

Cannot take the vocals beb. Macam mengaji.
Sudah pun ku mempernempahkan satu set VCD Layar Citra 2005. Ini dia saat yang ku menanti-nanti. Saat aku dapat lihat bertapanya memalukan peristiwa ikat kepala ku...

Planet DK nanti insyaallah pakai scotch tape.
Well i listened back to our set during DKulan finals. A sense of belonging seeped in for a while.
I realised that i was already such a let down for not writing lyrics and i shant make it worst by missing out the action. Selfish of me yea?
21 teams... i cant wait.

Planned to go Tanjung Balau, Desaru, again tomorrow but parents complaining that there might be a jam to and fro. So im stucked in sg..
So i sat thinking what i could do to get peace and quiet..
"Pulau Ubin!" hahahah then laughed.. betul ke ni?
But it would be pretty dangerous to go alone although itd be much fun exploring and taking pictures. Haiyah.. how?

Anyone up for Chek Jawa?
Pahlawan Putih

What a short week...

Yet when i recall the events in that weeks, it seems so gruelingly long.

Monday
Started the day off with a really annoying open book FPQA test.
Then after it was sleeping, eating and tv time. Since i could only retain info when i study from 8 to late, i did just that.

Tuesday
Catering Tech test was much easier, on the account that i studied. After that, i was struck with a case of temporary liberation. So i didnt study at all. Increased TV time. Got to watch the Must See Tuesday programmes.

Frankly, singaporean channels (*trying to find the right word...) sucks (with the exception of arts central). Lets begin according to chronological order.

Heartlanders. With such a thick chinese accent, its very apparent that the lines for mr wushuman was scripted. Policemen like mr limp-cactus-hair in real life would go something like "We go catch that thug lor. Quick, faster!" And stop it with the drama like its so drama.
Nak tembak pun kena buka wayang cina kejap. Apa jer. kata orang dulu-dulu, Jangan macam paham lah...

Shooting Stars
Just stop it. Cut it off from being aired. Its another bonesless of a storyline story. What is the freaking point? A follow-up to SG idol which was gruesome enough already? Here we see the same thing. Mr ingat dia handsome nak mampus tapi english karats nak mampos. A total embarassment to singaporean viewers for the media to think we would watch a programme based on the beautiful scenes and the 'beautiful cast' overlooking whatever form of storyline or substance. They're acting as good as they are singing/croaking (whichever applicable)

Full circle
Now thats an exciting programme. Actors who are good at acting. Maybe cos they are actors? This programme saved the 'Must See Tueday'. They were very good at bringing the audience to the past where kebayas were in(or are they still in?)

Wednesday
Went back to my Secondary school for teachers' day. I met my form teacher for less than 30 sec hor. Cos on my mind was the delicious tahu goreng from one of the mak cik's stall. Her husband, a.k.a. pak cik, makes the best tahu goreng these lips were fated to kiss. ah...

Then i headed to Tampines West CC for the script writing workshop final sesion rehearsal. it went alright.

Thursday
Nothing much happened. Only that i didnt go for a class but still had to go to school.

Watched Child of Our Time on Arts central. Very the good. Now i know why im shy. My mom has always said that when i was a baby, i used to cry when someone else carried me. haha

Friday
Planned to study all the way at bishan. I had to go the exta mile kilometers to copy notes.
The freaking annoying thing is we were asked to leave as it was raining and they need the seats for customers. For the love of disgustingly bitter coffee bean caramel frappacino, we had a cheesecake, two frappacinos and a latte. Arent we customers? F that bitch. When i have the time i will so complain. We were forced to finish our drinks in a hurry lah. Cb ah Cb. From now on i'll just stick with starbucks.

So walked ard for a while until... I RECEIVED A CALL....
"Hello?"
"Ko kat mana? Gi Shopping-shopping? Pakai Baju Merah kan?"
"Urh.. macam mana ko ta-u?"
It was then when i realised i was being watched. AH!!! hhaa It was indrah lah. Off day at bishan with his pasangan going to watch a movie.
For a whole good 10mins he had me fighten orh.. then i caught him sneaking outside popular bookstore. hahah kecoh..

Then i headed to Singapore post centre to continue with my studies. (hahaha that sounded like Singapore Post Centre is an educational institution.) Why there? later at night i had to make my way to haig road anyways(for training) so why not... sambil menyelam, kill two birds. hahah
Went to barang barang first for a quick walk of inspiration. The good thing about these kinds of furniture store, they look so comfortable and cosy that you just wanna sleep on one of their overly priced asian inspired sofas.

Training was nonsense. I m not writing lyrics for planet dikir even though now i feel like it. Have the idea all but no time to write. And besides, ardi wrote them already... A tad too simple even for me. Meeting him next thursday to talk about it. And its weird cos he has been the one commenting on my naskahs. Songsang.

Saturday
a.k.a. yesterday. We had our pementasan for the sricpt writing workshop. It was bad enough we were featured on Berita Harian on friday. (One more small step to fame. hahah. and yes im still 17) There was unnecessary pressure built up orh. But i think things went well for me. Our other group was awarded best script and they had a best actress in their group, Zah. Kenchang seh Zah. I knew it from the start lah.. Cos when she acts, she really focuses on the character. and their script was almost flawless that it was the centre of my envy.

Went home to a soothingly hot packet of kway teow goreng from bedok corner. Ah.. kwey teow...

All i hope for is that pak buang that is a cross of kelantanese and terenganuese (hahah) doesnt come back to life.

and todays sunday and tomorrow's monday, first day of exam.

Woo hoo
Pahlawan Putih